Jocelyn is back, and still smoking. This time Alan’s the one who spanks her.
It seemed like a good idea when I thought of it. Usually that’s how ideas go, right? Well, I had been smoking it up in my friend’s apartment munching on marshmallow popcorn when the idea crossed my mind. I hadn’t seen my friend, Chase, in a long time. He only lived about six hours away, a short drive through the middle of nowhere in the mountains, and I could spend the evening with him, getting stoned and doing whatever other things teenagers like doing when they have some alone time. Since Jon was out of town, that meant I could do whatever I wanted. Alan was busy with work lately and probably wouldn’t even notice when I got home. That was the plan, anyway.
When I got on the road I quickly realized how bad of an idea this was. After all, it was already afternoon, I wouldn’t make it to see him until about 7pm, and then I’d have to drive another 6 hours home at some point. Chase lived in a dorm, so I couldn’t just crash at his house, and I really needed to be home before Alan woke up the next morning.
But did I turn around? No. I kept driving, taking in the scenery, cursing the radio when there wasn’t a station within reach. It was actually quite amazing and liberating for a while.
I had a good time with Chase. We smoked a few bowls, fooled around, watched tv and ordered a pizza. I could definitely get used to college life.
But alas, around 10pm, I realized that I must head home.
“Awww, come on, Jocelyn, just stay here for the night. It’s late and the weather isn’t so great through the mountains at night,” Chase told me.
“Nah, I’ll be fine.”
“Really, you can stay here.”
I contemplated it for a moment. In my stoned state, staying there seemed great. But realistically, it couldn’t be done. A – I could not share such a small bed with another person, B – If I didn’t get home by the time Alan got up, I would be up for answering questions that I’d much rather avoid, and C – I really didn’t want to stay with Chase… it would be weird. “Thanks, for real, but I should head out. My brother’s expecting me.”
“Just be careful,” he said, standing up and opening the door for me.
He walked me to my car, making me promise another 10 times that I’d be careful before finally giving me a hug and waving me off.
Thankful to be alone again, and to have some extra weed for the ride, I headed through the place where they invented the term the middle of nowhere. There was literally nothing on the road. All I could see were stars and the occasional gas station. I put in a happy cd and gazed at the stars mostly, trying to pay attention to the highway. Not that many people were on it anyway at this time of night.
Around 2am, three hours from home, I had to stop for gas. I was super hungry and by this time had run out of munchies, so I stocked up on food at the station and rolled a joint in the parking lot. I smoked as I got back on the highway, now tired of my cd and listening to talk radio. It was the British news station and for some reason I found their accents oddly satisfying. And anytime they asked each other a question, I tried to answer in a British accent. Hey, it kept me entertained!
I was so tired by the time I got back into town that I was just ready to pass out. It was refreshing to see traffic, but slightly scary to see that the sky was getting brighter. I couldn’t believe that I’d been out all night. I was so delirious and somewhat stoned… it was ridiculous.
I stumbled in up the stairs to my porch around 5:30am. It took me a minute to find my key, and another minute to get it in the lock, but eventually i pried the door open. I eased it shut behind me, only to realize that Alan was awake, sitting on the sofa.
“Hey,” I said nonchalantly, like there was nothing wrong with the fact that I was coming home at 5:30 in the morning.
Alan raised his eyebrows, setting his laptop aside. “You’re home late?”
I shrugged and tried to hurry past him up the stairs, because if I could just make it to my room, I would be safe.
“Wait, not so fast,” he said, standing up and meeting me near the stairs. “Where have you been?”
“Out,” I answered. He looked at me, waiting for a longer explanation, and I said, “at a friend’s house. But look, I’m tired, it’s really late, can we just talk about this tomorrow?”
He was kind of taken aback by the amount of snappiness in my voice, and softened up a little. “What have you been doing?” he asked curiously, in a voice that made my stomach churn.
“N-nothing,” I stammered. “Just hanging out. I thought I could, since Jon was gone. You said I could go out.”
“Something tells me there’s more to this than you were ‘just hanging out’,” he said. He paused for a moment, and when I didn’t speak he asked: “Have you been smoking?”
I stopped breathing for a second. “No,” I said. Too late… I’d taken that pause… the one that gave it away I was lying.
He peered down at me and I tried not to chew on my lip and give away the fact that i was guilty. “Jocelyn… I don’t like this…” he said as if warning me that he was about to get really angry if I didn’t do something to make this sound any better.
“Okay, I did smoke a little tonight, but really, I’m fine right now, I was fine to drive, it wasn’t very far, but I’m really tired, can I please go to sleep?”
“Wait… you smoked tonight, and then you drove?”
“No, not like, um, that…” I said. “I just hung out with my friends, and later when I wasn’t high anymore, then I drove home?”
Alan folded his arms. “Where were you? And why on earth were you leaving there so late?”
“Well, I was at a friend’s house, and we, um, kind of lost track of time.”
He looked at me, waiting for an elaboration.
“What? Do you want details on what we were doing?” I asked.
“No, I want you to cut the bullshit and tell me what happened.”
I squirmed slightly, seeing the serious expression on his face. It gave me the chills. “Alan, please don’t be mad,” I told him, tears forming in my eyes. “Please…” I begged.
He only waited.
So I told him. “I was with Chase…”
“What, was he in town or something?”
“Wait, you went to see Chase?!”
I didn’t say anything, kind of just stared at the couch for a minute until it hit him what I was saying.
“Six hours away?! Are you crazy? And you drove like this?!”
Before I could respond, he grabbed ahold of my ear, dragging me toward the sofa. “Wait, no, Alan, ow, just a sec, wait, stop, I’m sorry!” I said. “I can explain!”
He sat down and pulled me over his lap.
“Go ahead,” he answered, resting his arms on my back. “What would you like to explain?”
“I’m really, really sorry. I feel awful about it, but I couldn’t stay up there with him, and I’d already smoked when I realized it, and I wasn’t that impaired, I was driving fine.”
“Are you kidding me? Do you even realize how dangerous that is, Jocelyn?”
“Yes, I know, and I’m really sorry.” I started sniffling, half crying as if to prove my point. “I won’t do it again, I promise,” I said, looking back at him now with a super innocent look on my face.
“You could have killed yourself! Or someone else!” He landed a hard smack to my bottom, and then another, and then: “This is the most irresponsible thing that I have ever heard of!” followed by a few more hard smacks.
“Owwww!! Alan!” I cried, kicking slightly. “I’m really sorry!” I tried to move my hand back to block the smacks, but he caught it before I could.
“I cannot believe this,” was all he could say, continuing the spanking. He hit me hard and semi-fast, certainly causing my bum to turn red very quickly. And while it wasn’t nearly as hard as the spankings Jon gave me, it felt as bad and I was crying like crazy.
“Alan, I’m sorry,” I repeated.
He concentrated on my sit spots for a few swats, and then gave a final set of hard smacks, before letting me up. My hands immediately few to my bottom, trying to rub out the sting.
I thought that Alan was going to give me a hug and send me to bed, but again, I was surprised. You know how I mentioned before that my brothers don’t get mad about much, but when they get mad, they get MAD? Yeah… well, Alan was MAD. He grabbed my ear again and hauled me up the stairs, to the bathroom, turning the water on super cold. “Get in.”
By this time I was not only shocked, but slightly scared. I don’t know if I’d ever seen Alan this upset with me before. “But… Alan…” I began, crying again. “I’m sorry.”
“I know you are, and I’m sorry, too. You’re my little sister, and you did something really stupid tonight. I’m going to punish you properly to ensure that this behavior does not continue.” I’d never heard this side of him before. It was worrying me so much. “Shower,” he said. I heard his voice shake slightly, and I think that’s what broke me down. He was really that worried about me… I didn’t want to be in trouble, but what the hell had I done?
He allowed me some privacy to shower, and I turned the water to be warmer because a cold shower was definitely not happening. The problem was that after a good smoke, and a hot shower, sleep was supposed to follow. And I was sure that Alan had something else planned.
And oh, did he. When I emerged from the shower fresh and clean and less stoned, he stood outside his door, belt in hand. This didn’t look too good.
“Come on,” he said firmly.
I, still in my towel, started to panic. “Can’t I dry off and put my pjs on first?”
He didn’t answer me, just took my ear again and brought me into my room. I noticed that my jacket was on my bed and the bag of weed on top of it. Shit.
“Care to explain this?” he asked.
“I forgot I had it.”
“So let me get this straight,” he began, pacing behind me. “You drove to see Chase, got high with him, then drove back home, until nearly six in the morning, through the mountainous countryside where anything could’ve happened to you while you were stoned and with a bag of weed in your pocket? It’s a miracle that you’re still alive and out of jail! It’s a miracle that you made it home in one piece!” I hung my head, feeling bad for what I’d done. “Is there anything else I should know about?”
I shook my head, sniffling, the tears now genuine.
“You are going to get the spanking of your life, little sister,” he told me. “And you know you deserve it, don’t you?”
I couldn’t answer.
“Well? Are you going to say that you don’t deserve it?”
“No…” I muttered. “I guess I do…”
“You guess,” he repeated, chuckling slightly. I heard the belt buckle jingle a bit, sending a shiver up my spine. “You’ll be lucky if I don’t tell Jon about this,” he said in an admonishing tone. “Over the bed,” he commanded.
“Alan, please, I’m really sorry…” I felt a bead of water slip down my neck, and the realization of how much a spanking would suck on wet skin finally hit me. Luckily I’d mostly dried myself off… but still…
Instead of arguing with me, Alan just gave me a slight push, until I finally got into the position he wanted.
I began crying, burying my face in my hands. “I’m sorryyyyy,” I sobbed.
He lifted my towel up to expose my bottom. By now the hand spanking he’d given me had worn off, something I expected that the belt spanking wouldn’t do for a while. Thinking about that just made me cry more.
“This immature, irresponsible behavior will not continue, Jocelyn,” Alan scolded, now bringing down the belt from hell onto my bottom. I cried out and squirmed, only to be greeted by another smack, equally hard, and surely leaving a bright red stripe on my backside. I kept my hands in front of me best as I could, kicking slightly, trying to endure the next lashes.
“I’ll be goooooooood, I promiseeee!” I howled.
“I’m very disappointed in you, Young Lady,” he said, pausing for a moment to move around to the other side of me. I cried harder. “You know better than this.” He then brought the belt down again and again, on both my bottom and sit spots. The sound of leather-meeting-skin echoed through the house as the sun began to rise. I felt my bottom warming up, too, and knew that it must be a bright shade of red by this time. It was aching so much, I didn’t know how much more I could take.
“Are you learning your lesson?” he asked.
“Yessssss!” I cried.
“What have you learned?”
“That I shouldn’t smoke or drive after smoking or be irresponsible or unsafe,” I said, sniffling, and crying more. My eyes were red and puffy, and I tried to wipe the tears away but they kept coming.
He gave me another couple of lashes with the belt, causing me to cry out again.
“Jocelyn, I care about you a lot,” he added. “It hurts me to see you put yourself in danger like that. I worry about you.”
I nodded, still crying, feeling awful for everything that I’d done, and the consequences of those actions. He finally set the belt down and sat next to me on the bed. He lifted me up slightly and I looked at him to see him back to normal now. Softer, more smile-y, more like the brother I knew. I let him hug me and I promised to behave from now on.
“Will you read me a bedtime story?” I asked him suddenly through my tears.
He looked down at me.
“Remember how you used to read me bedtime stories all the time when we were kids? You loved reading, and Mom thought it would help you practice, and then you just kept on doing it…” I almost started crying again, remembering him reading me stories anytime I needed comfort… if i was scared during a thunderstorm, anxious about school, or sad about my mother’s death. And I wanted that same comfort tonight.
“Of course I will,” he said. “Get your pajamas on, I’ll go turn off the lights downstairs and lock up then come read to you.”
I smiled and slipped on some tinkerbell pjs… I was feeling like a kid all of a sudden. As I walked to my bookshelf to get the book I wanted him to read out of, I passed my mirror. Curiosity got the best of me and I had to see the damage done. I pulled down my pajama pants a bit to see my red bum. My mouth dropped in awe… he had really given it to me good. It looked like I wouldn’t forget this one for a while.
I pulled my pants back up and grabbed the book, flopping onto my bed — on my tummy of course. Shortly thereafter, Alan came in and scooted me over, sitting next to me as he read my favorite story.
“Once upon a time…”
I yawned and before I knew it, drifted off to sleep.